Tuesday, May 21, 2013


He's "not the fizziest can in the six-pack." says one of the characters in The Mystery of Mercy Close: A Walsh Sister Novel by Marian Keyes.

I talked about Marian and how much I love her when I read the first book by her, Last Chance Saloon.*

I still love her and am thoroughly enjoying this book. 

That is not our subject today my lovelies.

The subject is my silly, secret, even giggly amusement at the ways people convey that someone is slightly nutty.

"not the fizziest can in the six-pack" was a new one to me and I reread it 2 or 3 times, inwardly (and probably outwardly) grinning.

Grinning like a woman whose cheese has slipped off her cracker.

Hehehe. I love that one.

Here's some more that I like:

Her elevator doesn't go all the way to the penthouse.

He's from the shallow end of the gene pool.

She's about a half-bubble off plumb.

 His lights are on but nobody is home.

 She's rowing with only one paddle or only has one oar in the water.

He has no tools in his shed.

 It's one thing to ride the little yellow bus, it's another to be the guy licking the windows.

 She's a few ants short of a picnic.

He's spinning crop circles.

Other people drink from the fountain of knowledge but she just gargles.

He's crazy as a sack full of ferrets.

And for all you sewers out there:

Her sewing machine is out of thread.

What is your favorite way to say that someone is bonkers? 

 *The book I am currently reading is the 5th and final book in a series about the Walsh sisters:
1- Watermelon; 2- Rachel's Holiday; 3- Angels; 4- Anybody Out There?;
5- The Mystery of Mercy Close by Marian Keyes


  1. A few cards short of a full deck.

    Not the brightest light in the box.

    One can short of a six-pack.

  2. Oh I love these! I had to look up this very subject while writing a manuscript once. I came upon this site, which has remained bookmarked for posterity. http://www.jmm.org.au/articles/14071.htm (The funniest thing about this list of insults is that it's on a Christian blog.)

    My personal favorites all seem to use the word "sharp." Not the sharpest tack in the cork board. Not the sharpest Cheddar in Vermont. Etc. I do occasionally make use of only running on two cylinders or mind like a steel sieve, but not often. I'm making note of the fizzy one, though. That's a good one.

    1. Love that Delia - especially this one:

      "Couldn’t pour water out of a boot with instructions on the heel."

  3. Love those! Especially "She's about a half-bubble off plumb."

    I'm fond of "not the sharpest crayon in the box" and "a few monkeys short of a barrel."

  4. These are so good. But I have nothing, I'll need to ask my dad, he's got a million of 'em. Sadly, it's nearing 3 a.m. And no one is up but me (and maybe you). ;-)

    (Several of her phrases have stopped me in my tracks...... the one I read today, as useful as a chocolate teapot.)